I never used to…

4 Apr

It’s a funny thing how the past invades our present. Even with our best intentions of living in the present (like “The Power of Now” by Eckhart Tolle, our brains are hardwired with memories of the past.

I find this coming to bear when I hear my inner voice saying “I never used to…” do/say/feel/think. Does this happen to you?

Perhaps this is how our soul tells us we are moving forward to become the person we are intended to be!   It is a way of tracking the positive changes in our lives!  (At least it is for me.)

When I hear a voice telling me “I never used to…” I know that I am growing!

Here’s my list of things “I never used to… (do)”

Examine friendships: In the past I would most of the work to nurture a friendship or relationship even when it was toxic. Today I know friendship is a give-and-take and it is up to me to “choose” whether to be friends with those who simply take.

Think BEFORE I buy (especially something is on sale); Today I realize that a “bargain” holds true only for things I will actually use!

Be self-indulgent; In the past I always put my ex-husband and my children’s wants before my own.

Say no to others (especially when they used guilt); Today I choose to say no when saying yes would overburden me.

Forgive myself; I used to beat myself up over and over for shortcomings of the past.

Protect my dreams; today I know that even well-intentioned people say cruel things they don’t mean.

Walk away from abusive behavior; in the past I would stand there and take abuse because I thought I had to – today I walk away as soon as I recognize it.

Realize that mean adults become mean seniors and people don’t change when they grow old.

Realize that love doesn’t have to hurt. I now know that real love means acceptance – not trying to change another.  I am so grateful for the love of parents and children!

-Trust my intuition; Today when someone tells me I’m crazy and I know I am not, I can laugh at them!

Be happy alone! I used to believe that being with anyone was better than being alone – and now I love my company!

Pick myself first! It is a pre-cursor to loving others.

Love who I am. It’s taken a few years to outgrow the poor relationships I tolerated in the past, but today I know that my happiness comes from within.

A friend told me this week that we tolerate disrespect from others when our self-esteem is low.  How true!

Don’t allow toxic people to invade your well-being (even if they say they love you!) Respect yourself above all others and you’ll find love in return.

It has been an adjustment to live the life I was intentioned to live after so many years being married.  My daughter, wise beyond her 26 years, tells me “sometimes you have to walk through fire to get to a better place”!

As a well-seasoned fire walker in life, I have to agree!

Wishing you a happy week ahead!

Carol

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