A post by Seth Godin last week resonated with me: “Reject the tyranny of being picked: Pick yourself”. One of the most insightful statements he made was:
It’s a cultural instinct to wait to get picked. To seek out the permission and authority that comes from a publisher or talk show host or even a blogger saying, “I pick you.” Once you reject that impulse and realize that no one is going to select you–that Prince Charming has chosen another house–then you can actually get to work.
I completely agree!
All too often we wait for others to guide/help/choose us and we miss beneficial opportunities while we wait! In scenes reminiscent of schoolyard days long ago, we stand around in life waiting for our name to be called and we give OUTRAGEOUS power to people who often have no idea that we named them our team captain!
Even worse is when those to whom we have given our also disparage us while we stand and wait. (Remember the person in class who was always picked last in gym class for the ball team? Maybe it was you!) Such is the scourge of childhood – but it should not be our legacy as adults. Being an adult means being able to choose yourself first!
Dump the baggage or pay the baggage fees…
Airlines charge for checked baggage. I believe we should do the same with the emotional baggage we carry around. We need to discard the unnecessary baggage – memories and past indifference that does not serve our best interests. We need to (re)claim our rightful power over our own being – the right to choose us!
There should be a Grown-up declaration day!
Many of us wake up to the realization of choice years after we become adults. How does this happen? Typically, we’ve gone from childhood to adulthood without a major rebellion – and may have seamlessly transitioned from childhood (where others chose for us) to an adulthood where someone else stepped in to control us (with or without our permission). For some reason, we missed the critical moment when we became an adult – and never seized the power to make our own choices.
No matter how well-meaning the loving controllers are in our life (husbands, wives, partners, bosses) – we deserve to take back our power to choose if we want to be responsible adults. Unfortunately, sometimes we wake up to the fact that others are governing our life – even if we gave away our power – after years of unconscious ignorance. There is good news – it is never too late to take back your power to choose!
You have the right to choose, just do it! It is time to take back the reins, make your own decisions and chart your own life from today forward. Stop giving OUTRAGEOUS power to others – Pick yourself first!
Have a great week!