The cream always rises to the top…

15 Nov

My weekend was tumultuous to say the least, involving a family crisis and caring professionals.   Just when life’s waves seem to be manageable, painful experiences involving loved ones drives a “perfect storm” of people, emotions, and environment.  In addition, when one considers how people behave in a crisis – hindsight and reflection show a hodge podge of caring and concern.

Without going into details, it is suffice to say that tragedy was averted and things are on the path back to control and calm.  I am thankful for my friends and my adult children who perform at their best and illustrate it finely at the peak of a crisis.  When the perfect storm hits, I want them in my lifeboat! They are the cream that rises to the top in a bucket of milk (my analogy of society).

As in nature, there is always an equal opposite – in this case, those who are selfish defenders of their ego. Such narcissism becomes clear in the midst of such crisis.  They go about their everyday life in a self-centered fashion and expect everyone and everything to be at their disposal and circle around them as the sun in their own existence.   It matters not what is happening in a crisis or who is in need, what matters is that their personal ego remains intact and they still look good to the world.  If there is any chance to swoop into the center of the storm and seem a hero, it is this minority of people who will do so.

bell curve in natureI am sure you have seen this in your own life. It is like a bell curve of society – with outliers outside the majority of the general population.

At the one end, are the old souls in our lives who are like the cream that rises to the top – the giving, caring, unselfish souls who put everything on hold in a crisis to help out those in need.  Out of 100 people, there are probably 2-3 of these incredible souls, and I always feel graced to be among them.  It is these rare souls that you want in your lifeboat when the main boat is sinking.

Then there is bulk of the curve – regular, everyday, imperfect human beings who do their best to help out in a crisis, but do not really have any idea what to do. Their comfort zone seldom goes beyond normal, everyday life, and they wait for someone else to lead when a crisis occurs. This group is like the gallon of ordinary milk, and they are the main fabric of our society.  They will remain civilized (in most cases) but will still shove their way into a waiting lifeboat (so that they survive).

The other “tail” of the bell curve extreme has the selfish takers (you have met these I am sure) who push to the front of the lifeboat line because they are so loved that society could not run without them (in their mind’s eye!)  They are the squeaky wheels who get the grease (so to speak) in our society… the ones who use the shoulder lane to get ahead in a traffic jam and figure that their time is more important than anyone else’s or who cheat the system because they feel that their superior intelligence/beauty/talent affords them special rights.  It is these people who rock the lifeboats to the extent that they would push everyone else out if it meant their appearance is at stake.  Often these are the charismatic show boats in our society who mask their deep insecurities through pontification and puffery.  I do not know where they fit in my analogy of a bucket of milk, but perhaps they are the bacteria in our societal bucket – sometimes good and sometimes bad.  If such people choose to give positively (at their convenience and comfort) it is a bonus, but always unexpected.  Their history is spotty at best, and often life is better when they are absent. Thank goodness, I have more cream than bacteria in my family.

creamThis week will be emotionally challenging as we pick up the pieces after the crisis.  I stand steadfastly in support of my loved one and will do everything humanly possible to stay visibly and emotionally present in the coming days.  I will be a steadfast and positive support – no matter what.  I am happy to have cream in my milk bucket (my family) – especially my daughter who has been a blessing through all of this.  My son is also a courageous giver for whom I give eternal thanks that he has graced our family.

Please keep me in your thoughts and send positive energy this week as the cream, the milk, and even the bacteria makes its way (so to speak) to pasteurization and good health.

To your health and prosperity!

Carol

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5 Responses to “The cream always rises to the top…”

  1. Peter Tuesday, November 16, 2010 at 2:28 pm #

    Carol,

    I hope things work out.
    You will be in my thoughts.

    Peter

    • Carol Dekkers Tuesday, November 16, 2010 at 4:28 pm #

      Peter, thank you. It’s one day at a time, one step at a time… and I have to trust the universe that there are good things to come a few steps down the road. Carol

  2. Renelda Monday, November 15, 2010 at 10:56 pm #

    You have a humble heart. The shallow ones who do not care about the goodness of mankind will suffer when they want someone in their life. I wish you and your family strength. God bless.

    • Carol Dekkers Monday, November 15, 2010 at 11:09 pm #

      Thanks… the shallow ones are ones I am chopping out of my life these days. Life is difficult enough without detractors trying to pull you down to their level.

  3. Steve Chizar Monday, November 15, 2010 at 5:28 pm #

    I am sure you will rise to the top as I have always known you to do and take care of the situation. Best of luck, dear!

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